This simple yet profound revelation, is something I am learning. How to die to myself so that my marriage may live.
I am willing to share my struggles and triumphs with you, in hopes that we can encourage one another on this journey. The life of a bride is so much more than titles and chores! If you open yourself up and allow yourself to be loved, then it becomes a freedom beyond all others. Freedom to love and be loved; for that is what we were created for.
I have two different pictures hanging on my bedroom wall. One is the scripture from 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 which says, 'Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. Love does not demand its own way. Love is not irritable, and it keeps no record of when it has been wronged. It is never glad about injustice but rejoices whenever truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.'
Every time my husband and I have a disagreement or argue I read those words. I will be honest with you, at times I am reminded of who I need to be and how I need to respond in these moments of wanting to rip his head off and beat my logic into his being. (A little graphic I know, but I said I was going to be honest.) At other times, I say 'Whatever! Aint happening today brother.' When I choose the latter, it always takes us down an even rougher road to recovery. Giving forgiveness is hard and being gracious, is well, gruesome at times to our selfish nature. But it is the perfect dose of medicine needed to counteract the virus of separation that begins to take hold in my heart.
The other picture states, 'Dance as if no one is watching. Sing as if no one is listening. Love as if no one will get hurt.'
How difficult love is. It has been proven, by our sin nature, that love, unfortunately, is often coupled with hurt. But we have no power to change the other person. We can only change ourselves. We only have control over how we respond and how we react.
So I am purposing to choose love, but beyond that, I am purposing to allow myself to be loved. Sometimes allowing ourselves to be loved is the greater task.
